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  • What the .....?!

    I got nuthin!

    http://www.wtol.com/Global/story.asp?S=8082496
    If you're ever walking down the beach and you see a girl dressed in a bikini made out of seashells, and you pick her up and hold her to your ear, you can hear her scream.

  • #2
    I guess he couldn't afford a $4300 hooker.

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    • #3
      And there's no picture of the table; maybe it was fantastically good looking.

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      • #4
        Maybe he thought he was smarter than the average bear, and when his wife reminded him that he wasn't, he blew a pic-a-nic gasket, which was quite a boo-boo.

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        • #5
          How do we know the table wasn't consenting? Will it also be charged with indecent behaviour?

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          • #6
            I bet it was flat.

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            • #7
              Meanwhile, this guy has given a whole new meaning to the phrase "tabling the motion."

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              • #8
                For him they can rewrite my old French primer:

                "Ma plume est dans la table."

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                • #9
                  Originally posted by tandfman
                  Meanwhile, this guy has given a whole new meaning to the phrase "tabling the motion."
                  But in this case wouldn't it be "motioning the table"?

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                  • #10
                    In the courtroom.

                    Attorney: "Are you sexually active?"
                    Witness: "No, I just lie there,"
                    "A beautiful theory killed by an ugly fact."
                    by Thomas Henry Huxley

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                    • #11
                      Wonder what the umbrella will do when it finds out?

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                      • #12
                        Um . . . all the umbrella table holes I have ever seen can accomodate some pretty big umbrella handles, so I'm thinking this guy must have a future in another line of work . . . :shock:

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                        • #13
                          Originally posted by Marlow
                          Um . . . all the umbrella table holes I have ever seen can accomodate some pretty big umbrella handles, so I'm thinking this guy must have a future in another line of work . . . :shock:
                          Making license plates?
                          Actually, if you click on the link in the first post, the story has been updated, and charges have been dropped. Apparently any new charges are predicated on determining whether school was in session while he was putting on his one man show.

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                          • #14
                            a kid at my HS got caught having relations with a Gatorade bottle so why not a table?

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                            • #15
                              Ive had sex with a pencil sharpener. Its no biggie.
                              phsstt!

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