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  • lonewolf
    replied
    Originally posted by rasb
    To be clear, this particular Dorothy was in her mid-20's, just to clear that up, and give the story more "upside", without risking any Lettermanesque slips....
    This is getting wierd. My late wife's name was Dorothy.
    Also, could we make her late-20s. My daughter does not condone my consorting with any female younger than my grandaughter.

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  • Daisy
    replied
    Originally posted by SQUACKEE
    They have a gas powered fan blowing on the sails to make the ship move.
    Ah, I must have missed that bit. Sometimes I've been known to skip to the end of the book. :shock:
    Originally posted by lonewolf
    I have heard the old timers talk of easterly winds but always dismissed them as signs of senility, sort of like folks in West Texas have heard of rain.
    Or the Brits who have heard stories of the sun. :wink:

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  • lonewolf
    replied
    Originally posted by Daisy
    Originally posted by Squackee
    ]off they went with the wind at their back
    If they were heading west, wouldn't the wind be in their face? Or is the effect of one mother of a northeasterly?
    I have heard the old timers talk of easterly winds but always dismissed them as signs of senility, sort of like folks in West Texas have heard of rain.

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  • SQUACKEE
    replied
    Originally posted by Daisy
    Originally posted by Squackee
    off they went with the wind at their back
    If they were heading west, wouldn't the wind be in their face? Or is the effect of one mother of a northeasterly?
    Havent you been paying attention? They have a gas powered fan blowing on the sails to make the ship move. Thats why the have to find The Wizard of Oil. Sheeshhhh..................

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  • Daisy
    replied
    Originally posted by lonewolf
    don't quit your day jobs until you get that first advance/royalty check.
    I see what you mean:
    Originally posted by Squackee
    off they went with the wind at their back
    If they were heading west, wouldn't the wind be in their face? Or is the effect of one mother of a northeasterly?

    Leave a comment:


  • rasb
    replied
    Just at that moment, the first Mate, Fernandez, came on deck.
    Captain Webb shouted out, Fernandez, I though you knew the way to Oklahoma. I do, said Fernandez, but you were leading, so I thought I would just follow for a while. By the way, you missed the Red, the Arkansas, and the Chickasaw exits...
    Captain Webb was distracted by a comely lass walking on the river bank. Helloooo, he exclaimed. Hi Sailor, she said, can you give me a ride back to Kansas.....my name is Dorothy, by the way. And take that stupid parrot off your shoulder... To be clear, this particular Dorothy was in her mid-20's, just to clear that up, and give the story more "upside", without risking any Lettermanesque slips....
    No, the Captain said, we're looking for the Oil Wizard - he lives in Oklahama....
    Oh, I know the Wizard, says Dorothy....Let me take you there.....
    Okay, says Webbie, and he gives the bird to Fernandez, and sets off with Dorothy

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  • SQUACKEE
    replied
    [quote="Pego"][quote="SQUACKEE"]

    Captain Webb pleads with Lonewolf, " Ya gotta help man, i keep running out of gas!"

    " I know, maybe you should move up to the 10,000?" said Lonewolf.

    Just then the faint scream of a young lady wearing a pushup bra and tied up in the hull of a ship breaks the silence at the exact same time as Webb breaks wind.

    "What was that?" asks Lonewolf

    "Nothing" states Captain Webb, "Move along, nothin to se here."

    Lonewolf's face turns bright red as he exclaims,"But I live here dammit"!

    Leave a comment:


  • lonewolf
    replied
    Yeah, time to introduce a damsel. brunette, about 5-6, 110#, B-cup.

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  • lonewolf
    replied
    Ya missed the left turn up the Arkansas River, tandfman. Now had they ventured up the tributaries of the Achafalaya to the Red River, in the late 1880s,shallow draft sailboats did get as far upstream as present day Lake Texoma.

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  • Daisy
    replied
    Originally posted by lonewolf
    He doesn't wear a lace shirt does he?
    I'm expecting far worse.

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  • Pego
    replied
    Originally posted by SQUACKEE
    Genius is often misunderstood so i shall carry on. There are some who quite enjoy my wrting.

    Lonewolf makes it down the 23 flights of stairs to the foyer and confronts Captain Webb with the obvious question, " Where in the hell ya gonna put gas in a Pirate ship, you freak?"

    Webb laughs out loud and says" The gas TANK , ya big silly. Now get pumping!"
    No lady in distress. How can we have pirates, gassy lonewolf and no lady in distress? Who will save her? Can't wait.

    Leave a comment:


  • SQUACKEE
    replied
    Originally posted by lonewolf
    Captain Webb's speech and persona is making be a little uncomfortable. He doesn't wear a lace shirt does he?
    All Pirate captains wear white fluffy and lacy shirts except the ones from Somalia and Pittsburgh.

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  • lonewolf
    replied
    Captain Webb's speech and persona is making be a little uncomfortable. He doesn't wear a lace shirt does he?

    Leave a comment:


  • tandfman
    replied
    Originally posted by lonewolf
    2. tandfman, in the interest of technical accuracy, please research the difference in natural "gas" and "gasoline".
    But, perhaps it is a moot point since three masted schooners are not known to operate on either
    Trust me, I know the difference between natural gas and gasoliine. I just assumed from the captain's reference to gas that he was referring to gasoline, and I also assumed that your business was oil, not natural gas.

    I confess that I overlooked the reference to the three-masted schooner (which was not in SQUACKEE's narrative). Did such ships ever sail the Mississippi or the nearby inland waters that seem to be the subject of this narrative? Not to my knowledge, but my knowledge in this area is scant.

    Continue the voyage when ready, SQUACKEE.

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  • SQUACKEE
    replied
    Genius is often misunderstood so i shall carry on. There are some who quite enjoy my wrting.

    Lonewolf makes it down the 23 flights of stairs to the foyer and confronts Captain Webb with the obvious question, " Where in the hell ya gonna put gas in a Pirate ship, you freak?"

    Webb laughs out loud and says" The gas TANK , ya big silly. Now get pumping!"

    Leave a comment:

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