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  • lonewolf
    replied
    Well, it is heating up but my advice to your guys is, if you have aspirations of a future in literature, don't quit your day jobs until you get that first advance/royalty check.
    In my capacity as editor and chief nit-picker I must point out:
    1. squak, my desk is walnut, not plebian oak, and those tremors were not from the bowels of the mansion but were the predictable aftermath of an ill-advised Tex-Mex lunch.
    2. tandfman, in the interest of technical accuracy, please research the difference in natural "gas" and "gasoline".
    But, perhaps it is a moot point since three masted schooners are not known to operate on either but this forum definitely runs on bs which does eminate methane gas, a potential fuel just as soon as someone invents the internal combustion engine.
    Be not dismayed, ya gotta expect constructive criticism in the author game
    Oh, yeah. Barney is a pink dinosaur. I am not quite that old and, besides, Barney is an inapproriate name for a rodeo clown. Ex-rodeo clowns are usually referred to as "the late " Colt/ Cody/ Cooter/Buck/Waco, One-eyed Pete, Jakeleg or other short descriptive reference to their previous profession or geographical origin.
    I have no experience in employing or naming British butlers, preferring the loyal native savage, so you are on your own there..

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  • tandfman
    replied
    >>Location: Pale, tired and ready for a nap<<

    I guess that explains it, SQUACKEE.

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  • SQUACKEE
    replied
    "Why do you ask, Barney", said Lonewolf.

    "Because there's one in the foyer sir and its full of big tough sailors all asking the same question." Said Barney

    "What are they asking Barney?" said Lonewolf

    "Are we there yet?!" replied Barney. :P

    Leave a comment:


  • SQUACKEE
    replied
    Seconds tick by when suddenly nothing happens. Just then Barney, Lonewolf's trusty, x-rodeo clown turned british butler, flies in to the room out of breath and slightly disheveled. "Sir, are you expecting a Pirate ship looking to fill up on gas or did i take one to many Brahma Bull head shots in my rodeo days?"

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  • SQUACKEE
    replied
    Head north to get to Oklahoma? Are you insane Capt.?

    Webb fired back, "Im not insane, i got dyslexia. When i say go north, go south. When i say go south, go north. When i say walk the plank, do the moon walk better than Micheal Jackson. You got it punk"?

    Well alrighty Captain! So should we head north or south to find Lonewolf?

    Captain Webb put his underwear back on and thought long and hard as his crew trembled in anticipation, "YES"! He said and off they went with the wind at their back and soap in their hole! I mean.......nevermind.

    Weeks later Mr. Wolf was sitting in his study, going over his stocks and bonds and assorted million dollar checks that were gathering dust under his mammoth oak desk when he felt a slight tremor coming from the bowels of his mansion.


    ....................to be continued............................

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  • tandfman
    replied
    Aren't you the guy who supplies the gas?

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  • lonewolf
    replied
    Seems to be a dysfunctional crew... but obviously skilled if they can sail upstream in a narrow river against quartering or prevailing winds, depending on the season....besides, they are 300 miles from my home stomping grounds. How do I get into the scenario? This is all about me, remember? 8-)

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  • SQUACKEE
    replied
    Captain Webb screamed at his men, " Weve run a-ground men!"

    "No shit Capt'n, its called Kansas, you jackass", responded a surly crew member..

    The Captain removed his eye patch and his underwear and ordered "Head north men, we gonna gas this sucker up and i know just the dude".

    "What's gas, Capt'n?"

    Webb glared down at the sea dog who had da blaz to question him and whispered,......"listen you village idiot....................shut...............up!"

    Leave a comment:


  • rasb
    replied
    Originally posted by lonewolf
    He was not in Oklahoma if he was still on the MIssissippi. You have to turn left at the Red River and I doubt any three masters ever made it as far upriver as Indian Territory.. .
    He will know he is in Oklahoma when he spies the Vegas style Indian casino at the Port of Catoosa, just east of Tulsa.. can't miss it.
    Doesn't anyone else want to play ? OMG, there are so many opportunities.
    Please jump in quickly, or else put up with the next chapter of this saga, from my fertile(?) imagination ( and fun research)...

    Leave a comment:


  • lonewolf
    replied
    He was not in Oklahoma if he was still on the MIssissippi. You have to turn left at the Red River and I doubt any three masters ever made it as far upriver as Indian Territory.. .
    He will know he is in Oklahoma when he spies the Vegas style Indian casino at the Port of Catoosa, just east of Tulsa.. can't miss it.

    Leave a comment:


  • rasb
    replied
    Originally posted by lonewolf
    More appropriately a prarie scooner....
    Captain Webb piloted his 3-master up the Mississippi, along with his trusty crew, who of course were made of straw, tin, and a mane. (Not as in bounding main). He kept shouting out, "Are we in Oklahoma?"

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  • lonewolf
    replied
    More appropriately a prarie scooner....

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  • SQUACKEE
    replied
    Originally posted by Marlow
    It was a dark and stormy night. Suddenly a pirate ship appeared on the horizon . . . uh . . . um . . . d'oh, writer's block! ops:
    Let me help. It was a dark stormy night. Suddenly a pirate ship appeared on the horizon and at the helm was Captain Webb!

    Leave a comment:


  • AthleticsInBritain
    replied
    Originally posted by lonewolf
    So far about all that has happened is the young man called Lone Wolf has become an old man called Lone Wolf. If you can make a movie out of that, Hollywood needs you.
    I think I've seen that one. Or maybe it was Benjamin Button on rewind ...

    Leave a comment:


  • lonewolf
    replied
    So far about all that has happened is the young man called Lone Wolf has become an old man called Lone Wolf. If you can make a movie out of that, Hollywood needs you.

    Leave a comment:

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